An urge and necessity to not to get to see anyone around who all are involved in my sexual assault attempt directly or cunningly behind my back.
Wishes to heal quickly from trauma and anxieties post a second rape attempt on me on Valentine’s week, 2017 and get rid to see people involved in that rape attempt directly, anytime around, who gets constant help to trouble me from.
Not taking names. It’s a tougher bait for a rape survivor like me or a victim to come out of the trauma due to a sexual harassment bad real incident who knows the criminals involved in that assault attempt. It is miserable that criminals often possess riches, certain crucial work positions or power which let them live like free men despite of their direct involvement in crimes, political, economic and other status and connections often save them cost actual punishment to add to the misery of a rape survivor or a victim.
To be able to see attackers, criminals and anyone who helps those criminals to commit sexual assault crimes for a survivor is almost a helpless condition. For me, I am a rape survivor twice by now, same acquainted or few so-called friends or ex-colleagues involved in both incidences, criminals are still free men and some people support and help them as I saw criminals around me even on a rape attack location latest lately. This often tends to suicidal thoughts to get rid of those criminals and their helping hands. Sexual attempts crime patterns often depicts nourished grudge on women often beautiful independent women which reflects human trafficking and certain criminal urges to become anti-social to indulge into his/their lust.
For me, I have come across certain anti-social men and women. Some of those men thought they could disconnect with me on social media platforms like Facebook, etc. and indulge into their lust privately which did not happen when few of them were not able to get a positive nod from me for marriage with such an anti-social men. Some of such group of men kept/keeps visiting me or rush bike ride around me for few year by now since end of June 2014 post I trekked Roopkund till recently. Some are silent or not socially connected men, a few ex-colleagues who are actively involved to help the prime anti-socials. Those men are inter-connected regularly but does not connect with me directly. Even in case I would drop in a text message to any of them, I would not get a reply directly but got next crime attempt on me from other of them or anyone else from their anti-social racket would rush to roam around me and not talk to me. Basically, those anti-social men are mostly not in talking terms with me since end of 2014. Anti-socials turned into sexual assault criminals as they chose to not to go into the path of love, commitment in love, etc but instead to attempt for rape, theft, threats, carrying loaded guns with them, riding bikes for short distances around me to threaten me, spy me wherever I go, visited office space SEZs without my direct knowledge, parked cars in my office parking lots without my knowledge, never made a phone call, written a text, e-mail, etc to become completely traceless in their chain of crimes. Even I have seen some of them spying me even when there occured three deaths in my family. Some jilted men does not let me work. Few visited my the then current place Kolkata in 2014 like an alarm of misfortune as they came to the city all of a sudden and then asked me to visit rather than I inviting them to so and so place for such and such reason or fixing a casual or formal appointment prior to a meet. Nobody can say any of these a family visit as no men from the city pent dwellers anti-social group brought family or friends along with them but may be another men, to be précised their crime partners. Some women say who have already slept with multiple men or who makes benefits out of my sexual harassment and trauma definitely can’t understand what a sexual assault on a woman can be. Some women helps those criminal men to trouble me.
I have seldom heard kind words after deaths in my family from those criminals.
There has been tremendous pressure tactics to get me into arranged marriage with one of the prime sexual assault criminals and make me a housewife which I disagreed/disagree hence my misery is persistant. I know why and how I am unemployed today. However, I am all human. I do not like interference in my personal life. I know I have not invited those criminals earlier or anytime to home or to visit me. They did/do not like my happiness, independence, travels, treks, work, personal life, dignity, etc. Hidden motives for the group of anti-social men who got into my sexual assault crimes tried to indulge into sexual satisfaction from one woman. Some of them are married men but they seldom brought their wives or children in anything related to this sexual assault attempts crime series.
Latest, two day ago I got to see one such prime criminal in sexual abuse attempt related riding bike around me nearby that second rape attempt location on me. I was walking down the street, I could not help stop that trespasser stop by. I feel bad. I am interrupted to heal instead of my dire therapies to heal. Criminals got to be punished.
I got disconnected from phone Net connections and whatsapp, I looked into my phone earlier that did not have a password. I try hard that nobody else writes a text or drops message in whatsapp from my end today, etc.
I have heard harsh voices, known bad words to stop say truth about those criminals.
Letting known inside out of a sexual attempt crime pattern I am undergoing. Wonder what helps.
A crime is a crime once committed. Urge punishment for sexual harassment criminals and related. Please stop harassment. Stop dragging previous bad sexual assault incident related things today and further to let me heal. To live and let lve. Please do not trespass a protected area or visit like a criminal. Please do not abuse.